Things that have annoyed me today

......and some things that annoyed me yesterday

1) Work - the whole concept
2) The fat chick on with the fitness first backpack on my bus. She obviously needs to spend more time there, and less pushing her fat butt in front of me to get on the bus.
3) Cafe people - you are NOT cool just cos you are having a decaf soy chai latte at Postal Hall.
4) People who say "that looks yum" while plaintively looking at the food I am eating.
5) Bike riders on the roads - if you want the same space as a car, go as fast as a car. If not, get back on the footpath
6) The fact I drive a 1989 Ford Laser with no powerstearing
7) Random people who have accessed my blog and left comments purely to pump their own websites. Damn Spammers!
8) The fact it is more expensive to eat healthy that to eat at McDonalds everyday.
9) That my blog has attracted no sponsorship dollars. Perhaps I should write something a little more mainstream...
10) The fact that I have been surly for the past two days and it is only making people at work be nicer to me which is pissing me off even more.

Todays Poll

A startling accusation was leveled at me on Wednesday night. While telling a story I was accused of embellishing said story in order to make it more entertaining. Further to this, I was accused of being the female Shaz! I vehemently deny that I am a pathological liar, however did agree to put a voting pole to get the public opinion on this topic.

If you believe I am the female Shaz please post your reasons. If you really know me well and realise I am not the female Shaz - please feel free to defend my honor.

www (dot)

Go to this site and see all the things you can do to get out of the crappy job that you hate anyway.

http://www.simplyfired.com/index.php

I espeically like the guy who was fired for getting kicked in the balls.

Stoopid

I have a slight case of Mondayitis. Maybe more than a slight case as at 8am this morning I was sitting in the kitchen at home howling "I don't wanna go to work". On Friday night two individuals annoyed me so much that I left work drinks. I couldn't stand to be around them. Who do you think I was stuck in the lift with this morning? The same two people - still talking the same crap about how fantastic they were.

Useless fact for today - The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building. Point of the story - engineers are stoopid!!

Implications and accusations

I wrote an email to an old friend yesterday as I was dealing with a colleague of his for work. He signed his reply back to me "Good to hear from ya, you old networker you". This had me dismayed - well more truthfully I resented his implication. Just because I don't email him in 2 years, and then only do so when it may help further my career doesn't make me a networker. It makes me a user. If I was a networker I would have bothered to keep in touch with him just for the sake of it.

I also resent the implication that I am on crack. Just because I have bizarre and vivid dreams does not make me a drug addict. Because you all have been so happy to falsely accuse me I am now not going to tell you what I was told by the giant penguin I sat next to on the bus this morning.

Thought for today – If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

The Hills are alive.....

Last night I had a dream that I was dressed like a Nun and singing “How do you solve a problem like Maria”. Today I have worn all black and white – I look like a nun. All I need is the wimple. (Otherwise I just look like I should be working on the customer service desk at Coles. All I need is the “Janelle” name tag).

I have often wished that I had a clearly defined job – eg. Doctor, lawyer, hairdresser etc. Nun has never really come up. Something about the chaste life of prayer and helping others never really appealed to me. Funny that.

How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maria?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o'-the wisp! A clown!
Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

Thought for today - Half the people you know are below average.

Thought for today...

A smart person told me yesterday that the toes you step on today may be connected to the arse you are kissing tomorrow. Because of this when a girl that I don’t like stuffed something up yesterday I didn’t do any of my usual reactions when someone screws up – ie. Rant or throw a netball as hard as I can at their head. Instead I just fixed the problem. I feel significantly less petty.

However when she did ask to borrow my white out that afternoon I lied and said I had none.

IM BACK BABY!!!

Many would say this blog has been too long in coming. I fear that I may have lost my loyal readers due to my lack of correspondence (But on the upside at the least the accusations of netball dictatorship have stopped). A lot has happened since the last blog. Netball grand finals have been won, Slytherin has been disbanded. I still have a 42 year old sister who is better at sport than me, but lets not go into that. Jonseey did not make it to NZ, and has not as yet been cooked and eaten.

I suppose I owe a reason for my lack of blogging. I am sad to say that the best I have is work. I have become yet another drone, wearing my black coat, trudging down Collins St of a morning. However I had an epiphany while on holidays - You need to work to live, not live to work. Therefore the blog has been reinstated - bigger and better than ever!! Remember to log on for my daily rant.

Speaking of which - the following position is currently being advertised at my work. Note the last line.

We are looking for a PA for the Sydney creative department, primarily supporting **** and ****.

If you know anyone who might be qualified and interested in the role, please have them contact *****. We can send a job description if required, but the primary role will be managing calendars, travel for the department, managing creative award entries etc. There will be no need to organize hookers and coke.

Bastards are now making us organise our own. What is this industry coming too??